One of the reasons I created this blog was to talk about my relationship with God. What He has done in my life and what He is doing. I feel like it is about time for another post.
In my relationship with God I'm the one with all the problems. If we aren't doing so well it's my fault. I have all the hurts and issues and questions and He is the constant one. I'm the one with the divided heart and the one that struggles and feels like I'm not even close. But as I think about all my problems I realize that God is bigger than all that. He looks past my failures and loves me for who I am. My issues don't keep Him away or stop Him from pursuing me. Even my sin is blotted out so nothing is between us. It is quite amazing to think about this love that is so deep and wide and long.
Lately I've been feeling like God is far away. I don't like long distance relationships. I need something close like right here beside me. I wonder why I don't feel God's presence like I used to. Maybe I'm not stilling my heart and my mind. Maybe God is choosing not to let me feel Him. Maybe what I felt before wasn't real. I don't believe the last one. It keeps on popping up in my mind though. But I know that I've felt the presence of God many times with different people at different churches. So I know that His presence is real. Maybe it's that I'm not hungry enough for God. There have been other times in my life that I've been hungry and desperate for God. I think the amazing thing is that even when I don't feel Him I know that He's here. I know that He will never leave me nor forsake me. I know that no matter what He is here beside me. Sometimes that promise is not enough for me. I want to feel Him, see Him, touch Him, hear Him. But for now I must cling to the hope that one day I shall be able to do these things.
God is good. He has given me so much in this life. He has given me more blessings than I could count. Most importantly He has given me eternal life. I love Him so much. I just want to love Him with all of my heart. But how can I do that?
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment