Why on earth did I take 20 units?

I feel so overwhelmed with school. I'm not even doing that much. I have tons of assignments due and homework to finish. But I just feel too overwhelmed. For the past few weeks I have gone into "I can't do it so I'm not motivated." It is so hard to be disciplined and prioritize my life. I feel horrible. I keep on forgetting to complete assignments on time. I have two tests this week and one next week. I'm not even sure I can pass my chemistry and history classes. Why did I let myself get talked into taking 20 units this semester? Well, part of it was my idea. I thought if I was too busy with school then I would have no time to think about boys. That was stupid. I know now that the only way to not think about boys is going into solitude and living like a hermit. So what have I learned this semester besides that I don't ever want to take 20 units again and I don't want to take chemistry ever in my life? I learned that I just can't handle it. I learned that if a boy is on your mind then there is no way of getting him off unless you prove to yourself that it is never going to happen. (that is a confusing sentence and I think I'm the only one that understands it) I learned that it is horrible to be so busy you don't have time to do stuff.

What do I want to do next semester? Take only 12 units. I want to get involved in my church. It has really bugged me that I can't this semester. I feel like school is a burden and a trap. It is really hard for me to spend time with God. I have time for Him but I end up wasting it. I feel like.... I don't use bad language.

Gentlemen

It is really nice when guys open doors for me. I have noticed that most guys at school will open doors for me. It makes me feel like a lady. I just want to say good job to all the guys out there who are holding doors open. I really appreciate it. Thank you.

Yearning

These lyrics describe how I feel today. I wanted to write it all out, so I did. It might not make sense. Maybe you would be better off not reading it. Sorry it is so bad but I'm not a pro. It just describes how my achy breaky heart feels.

Yearning

I'm wanting to start the next chapter in my life
wanting to become someone else's wife

Yearning for change
Yearning for love
Yearning for sacrifice

I'm looking for the one who will change my life
looking for a man to be his wife

Yearning for change
Yearning for love
Yearning for sacrifice